why Boulder?

Why not?! Boulder is where we live and a beautiful and amazing place.

Originally, we'd planned on marrying in DC or Northern Virginia, near where I grew up and my immediate family all live. Then things got complicated. My grandfather passed away last spring (April 2009), and we realized that having him there was what had been tying us to DC and without that we could be married anywhere!

There are two main reasons we chose Boulder, 1) it's where we live and can easily plan things in a hands-on way without having to pay for any travel expenses beyond a tank of gas and 2) the cost of hosting the wedding here will be significantly less per person than in DC or northern VA, so we're able to invite more people. The downfall of getting married out here is that it is virtually a destination wedding, even though we live here, we're asking the vast majority of our guests to travel here to celebrate with us.

Does the blog-o-sphere have any input on destination weddings? Is it somehow weird or rude to ask people to travel to you, rather than going to where most of them are? I figure that it's our wedding, and that everyone can plan their own wedding as they wish.

[caption id="attachment_683" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="original venue, Sequoia - Georgetown, DC"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_318" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="actual venue, St. Julien Hotel - Boulder, CO"][/caption]

nervous giggles during picture time

I get the nervous giggles. Especially when giggles can be inappropriate, like auditions, or when someone is trying to take my photo. Oops. At least I learned yesterday that smiling for 4 hours doesn't hurt my face like I thought it might. [side note- I wonder at what time of day my face will hurt, from smiling so much, on our wedding day]

Taking our engagement photos yesterday with Debi and Amanda was a blast. We started with a picnic near the Flatirons, up behind the Boulder NIST buildings. While walking back, Ben and I climbed on some rocks and stood in tall grasses to take some more photos. Then it was off to the St. Julien, where we changed into our fancy clothes and then took some photos of us all dressed up and eating ice cream (and by the rainbow wall).

[caption id="attachment_760" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="view from near our picnic spot, only 5 minutes from the car!"][/caption]

These ladies have some serious camera stamina! They took almost 750 photos of us! Wow. I wonder how many will come out well, 1/2? 1/3? 1/4? It doesn't matter, as long as we have a few were we both look like us, without bra/spanx/xyz issues. The point was to get used to being in front of the camera and spend some time with our photographers so that we're not all strangers in 4 months when they're our shadows.

yey for cool people/vendors!

Ben and I took the bus into Denver on Saturday afternoon (yes, we broke the "no wedding talk on Shabbat" rule, again). For some reason we we kinda disgustingly snuggly all weekend, but managed to pry ourselves a few inches apart so that we didn't scare off Amanda and her mom Debi, the awesome photography team behind Kokoro Photography.

Oddly we've found that the standard of how we get along with vendors is: cakewrecks. Yes, a fail blog is used to measure how well we get along with someone. Does the vendor appreciate a blog that catalogs epic fail cakes? If not, then how can we ever get along?

Afterward we went to visit a friend who was working at the Christkindlmarket, drink some Glühwein, and do a bit of shopping at Ann Taylor Loft (40% anything that wasn't on sale on Saturday, how could I not!?), 'case ivory is in this winter! So, I of course had to go start looking for sweaters and other things to wear for our wedding weekend. I'm going to need lots of outfits, oh darn! Here's the list (so far) of activities:

• Wednesday: bachelorette party


• Thursday: pre-mikvah get together? (then I go to the mikvah)

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Boulder Mikvah"][/caption]

• Friday: Erev Shabbat service & dinner w/ family


• Saturday: Shabbat services/Auf Ruf


• Sunday: WEDDING


• Sunday: brunch?

Is it weird to be thinking about the whole week before the wedding as part of the wedding? I jut figure there's a lot of potential for photo taking and I'd like to look a bit better then my usual PJ/crappy work uniform potato-sack self.

PS- try adding 2 pumps of gingerbread to your chai at St@rbuck$, yummy!

Boulderado bridal show

Ben and I went to a bridal show yesterday at the Boulderado Hotel. We went mainly to look at photographers, but ended up more interested in invitation stationery and greenery/orchids than the photographers who were there. None of them were bad, just not our style. We also tried some AWESOME cupcakes from some of the bakers, especially from Shemane's Bake Shoppe who did our friends' wine and dessert welcome reception. Mmmm, lemon poppyseed cupcake with toasted meringue frosting. Kinda makes me re-think the no cake idea. Oh well, NO CAKE! Not at our reception anyway. Maybe afterwards, what kinds cupcakes go with beer and soft pretzels (the current after party idea)?

SO glad we booked the St. Julien

[caption id="attachment_343" align="aligncenter" width="473" caption="18" of the 23" inches we got over 48 hours"][/caption]

If it snows like this, I know for sure that we can get married inside without messing up any plans or schedules.

Visiting the Venue and Weather Warnings

When I first got there, on 10/9/09 around 3:45 PM, it was slightly gloomy out and there was a big white tent on the [ceremony] lawn. I wandered around taking photos for a while, called a friend and chatted on the patio for a good 30 minutes, saw a hawk (and took it's photo), before heading home via the grocery store to prep and cook shabbos dinner.

The next day (Saturday the 10th), it snowed. That's not quite true, it started at about 9 PM the night before. There were about 2" total after 1.5" overnight and flurries all day. The temperature never got above 24ºF and it was COLD. Just to remind you all, that new record low (17ºF) set that day was set on our -1 year anniversary.

BE PREPARED AND CHECK THE LONG RANGE FORECAST BEFORE PACKING TO VISIT COLORADO. It would be unfortunate if you say packed a sun dress to wear to a wedding accompanied by the first snow of the year, or if you packed something fall/winter appropriate only to find it sunny and 75ºF.

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first catering meeting

Ben and I met with Tiffany, the catering coordinator at the St. Julien Hotel on Friday. I'd asked her to draw up some estimates/proposals for us on how they can work with our budget and IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S GOING TO WORK OUT WELL!!!! Huzzah!

[caption id="attachment_101" align="aligncenter" width="576" caption="ceremony lawn :)"][/caption]

We were hung up on the prices for a while, and seriously considered other venues, but this one had everything we wanted (most important being a weather-proof ceremony backup plan), and the fewest restrictions (out by 5 PM, not 2). It was also the priciest, but as long as they understand that the budget is strict, it shouldn't be a problem. Plus, Sunday lunch can be WAY cheaper than Saturday dinner, the typical wedding meal.

Ben's favorite venue was the Chautauqua Dining Hall, which would have been perfect if 1) the patio could seat more than 75 people for the ceremony 2) we hadn't had to stick with either 9:30 AM-2 PM or 5-9:30 PM hours. Blocking out the afternoon like that was the straw that broke the camel's back when we noticed that it would stomp out our afternoon wedding party ideas and mean that we'd have to have the ceremony at 10:30 in order to have lunch and be out in time. Sorry, but I'm not waking up at 6 AM to get my hair/making done on my wedding day.



Tomorrow (Monday) we're meeting with a potential wedding coordinator whom I found via The Budget Savvy Bride, a blog of DIY tutorials, wedding photos, and price break-downs of weddings held all over the country, submitted by brides (and maybe some grooms too?). Anyway, we're going to chat with her tomorrow about helping us pull it all together, herding cats (AKA relatives), and vendor references. Plus, the St. Julien requires we have a coordinator if we also have the ceremony there. I guess Tiffany, the catering lady, can only hold down the fort in one space at a time.

We still need: lighting, photographer, a DJ (who will mic the ceremony too), to finalize my dress with the seamstress, and to pick out a kettubah. I've tasked Ben with picking out the wording of the ketubbah, I trust him to find a nice egalitarian text, where the English isn't too far off from the Hebrew/Aramaic, and includes the Lieberman Clause.

Tentative Venue Decision

I think we're getting married at the St. Julien Hotel in downtown Boulder. The major decider: a weather backup plan. Although October is the sunniest month of the year in Boulder, I don't want to bet 100% that it will be beautiful outside. Yes, we're still planning on having an outdoor ceremony but if it rains we can all smoosh into 1/3 of the ballroom. They can set up something like 120 seats, and everyone else can stand around the edges/in the back. As far as I know, the ceremony will only be 30 minutes or so.

On thing I wonder is: Who is Saint Julien? Turns out, no one in particular (according to wikipedia), and I'm OK with that. I was just curious. Though Saint Julian is considered to be the saint of hospitality.

Now, I need to meet with the planner there again and hash out the financial details. As in, can we actually afford it? We'd be considered a budget wedding for this venue and would need to hire a coordinator for the ceremony, contact a rental company to get the fencing you see in the background of the photo below. That succesfully covers up Canyon Street and the Library. I love the library, but I'd rather have the focus on Ben, me, and the Flatirons behind us. Oh, and we'll getting married in that back corner, with people in chairs on the lawn. That gazebo thing, SO not our style. Plus, why would we want to put our awesome chuppah that my mom will be quilting for us under a gazebo AND face away from the mountains?

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="427" caption="from customweddingsofcolorado.com"][/caption]

Back in Boulder

I'm back from traveling South America with my family for almost a month. Wow, that was a long trip. I'm never going to leave the dude for a month again while I go traipsing around. I missed sharing things with Ben.

Like walking into a lamp post, having a systemic allergic reaction, oh, and actual the fun stuff too. Want to see the photos? Visit viola_in_peru on Flickr.

and that's one venue OFF THE LIST (and one on it too)

Friday night, Ben and I went to check out the Hazel Miller Band at the Millennium Hotel, the place with the yurt. Remember how I couldn't check out the bathrooms when we visited because they were locked. I kinda wish I'd never seen them....

I told my dad that they reminded me of CCC park restrooms. His response: "Heh, oooh. Not good." Correct, not good. The public restrooms on Pearl Street are nicer! There is almost nothing that can be done with just a bathroom basket to nicen this place up, it's just BLAH. Small, cramped, un-heated in the winter and BLAH. So, we decided that lest our guests believe that we never checked out the restrooms before booking the beautiful yurt, we said good bye to the Millennium Hotel.

From there, where the music was too loud for Mr. Ben's sensitive ears anyway, we were still in search of dinner. The original plan had been to try out the food at the Millennium while there were other people there instead of being doted on in an almost empty hotel restaurant. I would have felt awkward when they asked where we were visiting from as opposed to going on a busy night meant for locals.

We decided to check out the Chautauqua Dining Hall for dinner. From inside the Millennium I called to see if we needed a reservation (we didn't), and we were on our way. 15 minutes later we were walking up to the Dining Hall. At first I thought we were under dressed, wearing jeans and all, but once we got there I noticed two things 1) there was a wedding inside the main dining room and 2) not only were were not under dressed, in jeans, hiking shoes and a fleece jacket we were dress EXACTLY like 90% of the clientele that evening who weren't wedding guests. Even the waitstaff were wearing kaki cargo pants/shorts and t-shirts with a silhouette of the Fiddler on the Roof with the caption of "a taste of tradition..." I like blending in.

We shared a very good salad caprice as an appetizer, Ben had the Trout Amandine and I had the Fusilli Primavera. I thought Fusilli were the bowties, oh well, giant elbows are good too. Both our dishes were perfectly cooked and delicious. After we inhaled the appetizer and were sopping up the balsamic vinegar with the crusty sourdough table bread, I said "I just got a waft of something yummy." Almost immediately, our food arrived! I'll have to take Ben's word for it since his dinner was covered in evil allergens, but he said his food was perfect too. Mine was so good that I couldn't resist digging in before I shot the above photo. Sadly both photos I tried to take of Ben's plate came out sad and fuzzy looking. Oh well. Low lighting is not the best for an older digital point and shoot.

Dessert was by far the best course. A lemon tart. Yum. Ben said the decaf was good too, again, I'll take his word for it since I'm not a coffee drinker at all.

So, now we're still deciding between the St. Julien, somewhere else (which is now the Chautauqua Dining Hall), and the elusive Flagstaff House Restaurant. We haven't gotten to visit Flagstaff because we wanted to try the food but it's too pricy for us while I'm out of a job. St. Julien is no wilting flower in the price department either, but we can still afford to go there for lunch and know that the food is wonderful. Flagstaff is only open for dinner by reservation only.

Would anyone like to gift us a fancy night out for two? We'll be responsible (fiscally and calorically) and share the starter and dessert, or main and dessert, and drink tap water too so that we can keep our tab under $100. Anyone? No?I didn't think so. My dad had better come visit soon, maybe he'll take us....

tomorrow, tomorrow, I'll twirl tomorrow

Tomorrow I'm going to meet with a seamstress in Old Town Arvada (the town that I consider my personal version of hell) about making my twirly dress for me. I wish I could just order it from a shop, but um, my girls are too big. Are wedding dresses cut to juniors proportions? I thought WOMEN not GIRLS were supposed to be getting married. Oh well. I'm really just avoiding ordering up 4 sizes to get the bust fabric I need and then getting the whole dress taken in so that it will actually fit. I hope it's cost effective. Maybe I can bring her my own fabric and spend some time in DC/NYC shopping for fabric with my mom. She's also good at spotting colors. Maybe the seamstress can just be hired as a pattern maker and then I can still sew my own dress! THAT would be great, Though I'd rather not have to make the inner corset on my own and I do like me a form fitting/super shaping corset.

Anyone have any feedback on wearing a corset all day? I haven't done it since I was reenacting the year 1771 from 1994-1999. I was, um, a very different size then.

What about making my own dress? I don't know how to make a corset. That's the long and the short of it.

St. Julien site visit

Here's my report on my visit to Boulder's St. Julien hotel yesterday morning:

This is the view that we'd have for the ceremony (imagine the retaining wall with a lattice work the hight of the taller posts, to block the street view better). The chuppah would be in the corner, with a table over the electrical access plate, and the isle running diagonally across the lawn.

This gazebo is where a lot of people set their ceremony. How dull. Who wants a view of a the hotel? The mountains are a much better backdrop than the hotel, IMHO.

This is the far end of the ballroom. There are 3 parts, this is the smallest.

This is one the chandeliers that are in the ballroom. Just thought I'd show off how the ballroom is more modern/contemporary, and less East Coast opulent.

Here's the closer/front of the ballroom with breakfast table settings on cream cotton waffle table linens.

Here's a picture of the carpet. It's a dark bluish charcoal with a leafy motif. Definitely not the plushy paisley  we were seeing on the East Coast.

Here's the view from the lobby. I LOVE BOULDER!

This is the lobby. The window looking area on the left is a HUGE gas fireplace. It has broken industrial glass on the bottom, instead of the fake logs that you usually see. The reason it looks like a window is that it can be opened on the other to provide a fireplace for the patio (where we'd have cocktails).

The main entrance. I like being pampered at nice hotels. It's a great touch when they open the door and greet you as you're coming and going. Such a nice touch.

Stone Mountain Lodge

Um, there was no lodge. The bathrooms had showers and brown tiles. The ceremony site was gorgeous, but the reception tent was just eh. The "bridal tent" smelled like mildew.

Overall, you'd get some decent bang for your buck, but it definitely isn't the right place for us. Though I did meet a really helpful caterer/event planner. With this venue, I'm too worried about everyone 1) getting stuck in the mud if there's any inclement weather and 2) it being a place you have to drive too, people drinking at our simcha and then driving is a big fear of mine. I think we're going to stick with places downtown, within walking distance of a hotel, or at a hotel/lodge that has an actual lodge and isn't a motel.

Whatever, I sound like I'm bashing the place.... That wasn't my goal. If you're into cushy rustic, then this is the place for you. From the cute little cabins I saw a family of deer, and the vistas are amazing. But, apparently I'm attached to amenities like pavement and nicer bathrooms. Oh well. I'm sure it is the perfect place for the right couple.

 the cute little upstairs of a guest cabin
reception tent dance floor

the bridal tent/getting ready area (me in the mirror)

duck pond and yellow wildlife crossing sign in the background

outside of the reception tent

ceremony area

bathroom building with mini storage barn in front of it

looking down at the reception tent and duck pond from the entrance

one of the guest houses

mule deer

looking down the corridor at the motel-like rooms

the area where you’re allowed to put RVs and tents

Millennium Harvest House

Here are photos of the tour the dude and I went on this morning. The minimum is $10,000, with a $500 setup fee. They only hold one event per day so there's no need to worry about not having a weather backup plan because someone else got in the way. I've annotated the photos. I forgot to take photos of the day room that we would have access to all weekend, but it's about 800 square feet and has a large bathroom. It also has a wall of windows and they'd bring in whatever furniture we want in there, we only saw it bare. The only rules for the day room: no sleeping overnight in there and no liquor. They would also provide one complimentary "superior" room for Ben and I to have the night of the wedding.

The hotel is totally OK with us using an ice cream cater (though they would rather arrange it, like most other places) as well as having a flambe station. Candles and open flames are fine. There are a bunch of glass/mirror things we can use for no extra charge to make up table decorations, and their regular china is just fine but they have an arrangement with a rental company if we want to upgrade. I wonder if we can have a bonfire too.... That would be icing on the cake.


The Pavilion, or as I like to call it, the yurt, can hold up to 300. They put down a portable dance floor out on the side where the tennis courts are. There are dark green, waterproof canvases (I think they have windows) that can be rolled down if needed. There are also space heaters they can bring out if we want to stay outside even if it's totally freezing. The bathroom is on the right.



Here's the covered pathway from the hotel to the pavilion/yurt. The bathroom is on the left. It was locked, so I didn't get to check it out.



This is the lawn where most people set up their ceremony. You can see the mountains through the frees. The bridge goes over the creek and joins the Boulder Creek Path, it goes all the way out to the synagogue (34 blocks) and up to Boulder Falls (passing Pearl Street, about 1 1/2 miles away). That's the edge of the pavilion on the far right.



The tennis courts in the background are covered in big white bubbles by mid September.



This is the indoor/snow/rainstorm option. It's a ballroom. It has windows that overlook the courtyard where the pavilion/cocktail area/lawn are.